March 9, 2023
When Grief Turns to Depression
My beloved child grieving is a painful thing, that only you know by losing someone close to you. Is there a specific amount of time you are to grieve? There are many references in the Bible to the amount of time to mourn loss after the burial – thirty days to three months, however, it may take a year to mourn the loss of a child or longer. Example: after Moses’s death, the people of Israel mourned for thirty days. (Deuteronomy 34:8) Bathsheba mourned the loss of her husband for seven days. (2 Samuel 11:26-27)
Job became Satan’s target because God favored him. He suffered tremendous grief when ‘in a day’ he lost all his animals, farmhands, shepherds, servants, and children. (Job 1:13-19) Job stood up and tore his robe in grief. Then he shaved his head and fell to the ground to worship God. He said, “I came naked from my mother’s womb, and I will be naked when I leave. The Lord gave me what I had, and the Lord has taken it away. Praise the name of the Lord!” (Job 1:21)
In all of this, Job did not sin by blaming God. (Job 1:20-22) If you find yourself in a place where you are angry and have blamed God for the loss of a loved one, repent. Job was an innocent man; Satan attacked him! (Job 1:7-12) Not long after, he came under personal attack boils all over his body. He suffered so severely that he took a piece of broken pottery to scrape off the scabs. (Job 2:1-8) As if he hadn’t gone through enough, his wife turned on him and told him to curse God and die. (Job 2:10) According to God, Job was perfect, righteous, feared God, and did no evil. (Job 1:1, 8, 2:3)
Despite all his losses, he did not get angry at God, nor did he do anything against God. (Job 2:10) When you are grieving, your health can suffer, and have a loss of appetite. When you are grieving is a time, you need an encourager. The next thing Job had three friends that came to encourage and mourn with Job. (Job 2:11-12) They were of no help; they stayed with him to mourn for seven days and nights and didn’t open their mouths to say a word because of Job’s intense grief. (Job 2:13)
If you lost all your children in a day, you would be in severe pain, as well. When you lose someone close to you, your friends are heartbroken right alongside you, and they do not know what to say because there are no words to express their sorrow for your loss. Job spiraled into a deep depression, and his friends tried to comfort him with advice – not based on the wisdom of God. (Job 4:27) His friends got fed up with him and shut up, and Job got mad at them. Finally, a young man speaks the truth to Job concerning the Lord and challenges his behavior. (Job 32)
God restored him in the end with more children and gave him double for all his trouble when he prayed for his friends who judged him. (Job 42:10) If you have gone through an intense season of attack and loss, you are in good company. Begin to pray for your friends and watch God turn it all around and give you double for your trouble.
Allow me to share my personal experience of losing my parents. The Monday before Thanksgiving 2013, my mother died suddenly and unexpectedly. Personally speaking, when it is unexpected, and suddenly it is shocking! I mourned for two months. Then it was time to pick myself up by the bootstraps and get moving forward.
On Valentine’s Day 2015, my dad passed – he had been ill for six months prior. Even though you try to prepare yourself, you’re not prepared. We were so exhausted; it was hard to feel. One week before his death, I was given a prophetic word, that when my dad passed, I had one day to grieve his loss. I thought one day! Really? But when he passed, the ministry schedule was full, and the only time I didn’t have anything on the calendar was the week of his death and funeral. I knew from the Word I had received, that I was not to cancel anything. I proceeded forward in obedience to God.
I can tell you I am not sure the day I grieved, it may have been an hour here and an hour there, and all of it combined equaled a day. However, I can tell you from experience, and through scripture, it is not the will of God to grieve for long periods. Grief is different for everyone, and everyone grieves differently. The only way to move forward after the loss of someone you love is to lean on the Father in heaven. He will heal and restore you.
I am reminded of the old hymn ‘Precious Memories’. I now understand why they’re called precious memories when you lose someone you love. I remember the nights I traveled from Dallas and spent the night with Dad and Mom. About midnight I would hear my mother praying to call every member of the family’s name out to God, each one of her children and grandchildren by name, and I couldn’t stay in bed, I would quietly in the dark join my mother in prayer from the side of her recliner. Precious memory!
This week my grandson Joshua and his wife Caitlin gave birth to their second son, and they named him after me, Brooks. He came into this life as a warrior and fought hard for his life and lived seven days and stole our hearts. We had five of seven wonderful days with him before there was a sudden change. He gained his wings! His memorial is on March 8, 2023. I must say, being present through the last week and watching my grandson and his wife deeply hurt has broken my heart. I can tell you the loss of a child is harder than a loss of a parent. Just prior to his death my grandson and his wife called me and said, Nana, ‘how can we baptize Brooks?’ I said, ‘Joshua Caleb Moore you are the priest and spiritual leader of your family, you have the authority to baptize and dedicate your baby unto God!’ I gave them instructions. Joshua baptized and dedicated Brooks to the Lord just prior to this precious angel meeting our Lord and Savior. Brooks Caleb Moore February 28-March 6, 2023.
